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Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Skeletons

When my wife and I were planning our wedding, we asked the pastor of the church we were then attending to officiate the ceremony for us. So, he agreed, and he wanted to do a few sessions of premarital counseling. That's great, and it would have been great, but he was... (we'll just say that he wasn't right for us). I mean, his biggest obsession was trying to figure out what all the "skeletons" in our "closets" were. Well, we ended up dumping him and getting a friend of ours to marry us, so "Pastor Peter" is now just a fleeting memory.

I tell that story as an intro to share about the REAL skeletons in our closets in our house. And by that, I mean those places in our house where there is constant turmoil, but no matter what we do, we can't seem to get it together (and, I mean this literally). So, here they are:

The Sock Bucket. 

Some of these socks have been in here for years. We're still looking for their brothers.

Anybody else out there have one of these things in their house? You know, the place where all the onesie socks go? We do, and let me tell you, it can be a major disaster. The other day, my wife emptied out the entire bucket looking for a pair of socks, and only found 8 single socks. The thing is, she actually only has about 10 pairs of socks, so WHAT THE HECK. Where in the world are those 8 matches? Where!?! Only one place, probably, and we'll need to trek to the basement for it...

The Laundry Pile. 

(I REFUSE TO TAKE A PICTURE OF THIS...)

Here's where I provide a link to this post about why our laundry pile is ridiculously high (We have Four Kids). There have been a few times in the past year where we have effectively washed every piece of dirty laundry. But then, our kids took a bath, or wet the bed, or decided to make mud pies that day, and... we're backed up again. What can you do? Well, since we're already in the basement, let's head over to another place I would normally ask you to avert your eyes from...

That One Corner of the Basement. 

(AND THIS...)

This is where we keep things like certain Christmas decorations, my wife's pile of Stuff-That-One-Day-She-Will-Sew, a toolbox, a large bag of children's shoes (having four girls necessitates that we save every single pair of shoes - some kid will eventually wear them), a large plastic bin that we're just not going to open, a bag of bags, wrapping paper, Holiday-themed books and movies, the list could go on. Let's just say that every time we try to organize it, it seems to get worse. 

(Thinking about these places of chaos makes me feel overwhelmed, so let's go see if my wife will make us some brownies. Oh, no, that leads us to another one...)

My Wife's Baking Stuff Cabinet. 

Of course, since I've written about it, it doesn't look so bad...
The Wife loves to cook and bake - awesome! However, this cabinet is sort of like one of those closets where you open it, and things just start avalanching toward you. Or, it's sort of like a Muppet Babies closet - remember that? - You open a door and all of a sudden it's space, or a jungle, or ... you get the point. She'll clean it out and straighten it up occasionally (one time, she found a whole bag of Craisins, unopened, that had been shoved in the back of it for probably a couple of months), but then it will slowly make its way back to the mysterious jumble from which she will create bakery goodness.
So, there you have it. Four of the skeleton-filled places of our household. I've heard that the more you share the bad stuff about yourself with people, the closer you feel to them. So, you should all feel closer to me now, and I will just imagine all the messy nooks and crannies of your homes and I'll feel closer to you. 

2 comments:

  1. Haha, this is my favorite post so far. Just so you know, it's much more efficient to store your odd socks in a ziploc baggie - that way they all stay in one place and can't escape. Wait, but then when your baggie gets too small (because I save odd socks for at least 10 years thinking the matches will have to turn up someday), you have to add another bag, and another, and another, until you finally have to fill an entire laundry basket full of your bags of socks. And then the day came when my kids had mismatch day at school, it makes me feel so efficient having those baggies to pick from.

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  2. That's a good idea. Our four girls tend to dig through those socks as if they're digging for gold! They send them scattering everywhere (especially the 3-year-old).

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