Recipes, Dad-Style (or, When I Take This Blog to the Next Level)

Mommy bloggers always seem to have a lot of recipes on their site, so I thought I should fall into line with some of my own - Dad-style! In an effort to maintain the copyright authority on these recipes, I would like to formally ask all who read this to please NOT publish them and pretend that you made them up. I'm absolutely certain you will want to and the temptation will be great once you read the recipes to these culinary masterpieces, but, please. Please do not steal them.

Both of these recipes highlight peanut butter as the primary ingredient. Relatively cheap, good source of protein, and more healthy if you buy the health-food store variety (which we don't) or make your own (not happening in our house). The kids sort of like peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, but that is not the best way to utilize such an amazing ingredient (and usually they don't like them together).

Some of the kids like to just eat a spoonful of PB if they are hungry. A healthy plan would be to eat it with celery or bananas. I mostly like it with chocolate wrapped around it in the shape of a little cup and inserted into bright orange packaging. My wife has not yet learned how to make them like this. (Sigh!)

Here are two of the most popular snack ideas in our house involving peanut butter:

Peanut Butter Balls - a great snack for the kid who never seems to eat enough protein at meals and so you want to trick them into eating some protein later on in the day.

Put a glob of peanut butter in a bowl. Mix in some maple syrup, honey, or corn syrup. Add some powdered milk. It should be easy to stir at this point (starting to form together), but still too sticky to form into balls. So, you add a little powdered sugar to help the process along. These should feel like soft play-doh as the end product, but trust me, they taste much better.

NOTE: At first, the Wife liked to add in wheat germ (I know, what the wha...?!). Then, one day she ran out and so made a batch without it. It was such a hit with everyone that they made her promise never to add wheat germ in it ever again. So, she didn't. (Good wife! And this is where I pat her.)

Peanut Butter and Marshmallow Toast

We've tried to think of a wittier name than this, but apparently we're not that creative. Once you read the recipe, maybe you can help us out with that in the comments or through facebook or twitter (do you like how I did those shameless plugs? Seamless, eh?)

Take a piece of bread (it can be white, wheat, gluten-free, homemade, whatever). Spread your choice of peanut butter on it. Sprinkle marshmallows on top. Broil until marshmallows are warm and toasty. Eat.

NOTE #1: Little marshmallows are preferable to big ones. However, if you only have the big ones, just split them in half or thirds and use those. Marshmallow cream or fluff only works if you are making a regular sandwich, or what's commonly known as the "Fluffernutter." That is very different from the "Peanut Butter and Marshmallow Toast" but I guess just as good, in a different way.

NOTE #2: My wife has also made these with saltines instead of bread. That's how she grew up eating them. I think the bread way is better. 

And if you don't have any of those ingredients, just grab a bag of chips with a coke.

Don't Learn These Things on Your Own; Take It From Me.

I like to think that in life, some things you have to learn for yourself, and some things are better to let other people experience and you learn from their fallout of why you shouldn't try the same thing. Here are some recent happenings in my life that I hope you will be able to learn from and not repeat. Unless, of course, you can think of a way to improve them...

• First:  So last week, my sister and her family were visiting, and we happened to have two slip-n-slides (it's sort of a convoluted story about how got two of them, we actually only paid for one, though, so that's good, I guess). Afterwards, my sister had this idea to combine them into one long slip-n-slide, and so we did that Sunday (when my niece was visiting) but SPOILER ALERT, Michelle: it didn't work. Why? Who knows.  Maybe the girls didn't weigh enough. Or maybe they don't know how to slide that well. We did put some baby shampoo on there like some people said to do, but they were only able to slide a short way into the second one. Disappointment. 

This set-up worked the best. Photo credit: My sister, Michelle.

• Secondly: If you leave your garage door open at night (not on purpose), it is too much temptation for some sort of animal to resist and he will sneak in there and rip open a bag of garbage that you didn't take to the dump on Saturday. Then there will be maggots.  And you will have to clean everything up because you're the Dad and you handle the garbage.  And, maggots. Lots of maggots.

(Do you really want to see a picture of this?  Well, sorry to disappoint you, but I didn't take one. I was too busy trying not to be completely grossed out. Remember... maggots.)

• Thirdly: If you post on your blog about remaining hopeful despite adverse circumstances, you will be challenged in a most cruel way when you take your van to get a state inspection and the mechanics will only pass it if you fork over at least $700 to them for repairs (they wanted $1000, but said the brakes could wait a while longer. Well, those brakes will be waiting a while longer... ) So, before you start to write that blog post about overcoming adversity, you may want to think again. Or, maybe you actually need to write it because it will be clearer in your mind when the adversity happens that day, because inevitably it will. 

Yes, this van.

I end this informative post with a thought-provoking, philosophical question... If a child has a temper tantrum in the middle of her bedroom, but no one is in the house to hear it, does she really make a sound?

(Ponder away.)

What's the Point of Writing?

In the past I have asked myself, “Why are you writing? Why do you do it?”

After receiving several rejections from agents, the answer became less clear as more doubt seeped in.

Why do I do it? Don’t I have anything better to do with my time than sitting by myself putting words on paper or screen, words that no one other than my wife or children may read? Couldn’t I choose a less masochistic profession, maybe something with a bit more affirmation?

There is a part of me that would have loved to choose something else, something less time consuming. I already have more than a full-time job raising my children and homeschooling them. Do I really want to spend my nights, weekends, and kid nap times sitting alone writing?

Obviously I chose not to write during this Baby Nap Time.

Though at times I would love to pick a different career, I can’t seem to break away from it.

But why? Why can’t I?

When the brief feelings of rejection and failure dissipated, the reason I write became obvious – I like it. 

It’s as simple as that.

I didn't start writing to become famous or rich, and I'm not under any delusion that my novel will become the next Lord of the Rings or Harry Potter. So it's not really complicated at all.

I'm not planning the Lego set for my book. Although that would be awesome!

This may sound weird, but I like to imagine things. I like stories and adventure, and if the most I accomplish as an author is that my children and wife read and love my books, well, I have to believe that I’ve accomplished enough. 

I would love to make a living off of my writing. I would love my book to sell well, and I will do everything in my power to make that happen. But in the end, my purpose isn't riches or fame. It is to create a good story, and when I’ve finished writing a book, I know that is what I’ll have. If I don’t see that before I am published, I will not see it after.

This much I know. Doubts are immune from success, and no amount of money can drive away insecurity. Believe in your book, even if no one else does. Now I’m not saying that your story couldn’t or shouldn’t be edited or critiqued. Nothing is perfect, even our own writing. 

But a writer’s view of himself cannot hinge on what an editor, an agent, a publisher, or a critic thinks of him or her.

When it comes down to it, only those who write because they love it will persevere. They will have success, because their view of success will not be dependent upon someone else’s actions.

Take some advice from these girls and love what you do.

My point is this. The only reason to write is because you love it. It’s the only way you’ll stick to it, especially once you see the bank account of a writer (and I’m not talking about the rich ones). This career path can be very lonely and discouraging, only the love of it will make it worthwhile.

I've written more about this in other posts... if for some reason you need some encouragement in your writing, maybe they will help you:

The Loneliest Career

The Art of Rejection

Put Yourself Out There

Write What You Love